Five Mistakes To Avoid When You Tell Kids You're Divorcing

Law Blog

If you're a parent who's divorcing, you need to have respect for the fact that notifying your kids is going to be one of the most important conversations in your life. 

The following are five mistakes you need to avoid when you have the conversation with your kids to ensure that they get through your divorce without any stress or trauma:

Informing the kids separately

Even if you and your spouse are not getting along at the time, you should try to inform your kids of the decision to divorce together. If you talk to them about the issue separately, you may give them differing viewpoints and leave them feeling like the two of you are pointing fingers about who is at fault in the situation.

Bring the entire family together for the talk about your impending divorce to make sure that a fair, unbiased message is put across to your child or children.

Not planning out in advance how you're going to tell them

It's important not to go into the conversation with no preparation whatsoever. This is a very sensitive subject, and there are a lot of emotions on the line.

Think about what you're going to say to the kids and make a list in your head about all the factors you'll need to explain. 

Assuming you know how your kids will respond

You may feel like you know your kids very well, but don't make assumptions about how they will take the idea of you divorcing from your co-parent.

Go into the conversation prepared for anything. You may be surprised at how emotionally or how unemotionally your kids react. 

Failing to pay close attention to your kids' response

As a parent, attending to your children's emotional needs is one of your most important jobs. When you explain the divorce situation to your children, it's important that you carefully observe their reaction and are aware of how they're taking things.

You'll need to be in tune with your children's emotions throughout the entire ordeal to ensure that you handle parenting through a divorce as carefully and compassionately as possible. 

Failing to cover the basics

Depending on how old your kids are, they may not necessarily understand everything that divorce entails. Be sure that you take the time to carefully explain what's happening and answer all their questions.

Make sure you explain the basics: that you will not be living together anymore, that you will no longer be husband and wife, and that your children may need to split their time between two different homes in the future. 

Contact a company like Hazlett & Pedemonte for more information and assistance. 


5 July 2017

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